Yitaro Matsuura: What should we think about loneliness and loneliness?

2022-06-02 0 By

If it’s a party of three or more, I try not to go.Parties and other activities are politely declined, received drinks and dinner invitations, is also declined to avoid.In other words, I am a “very bad person”.I am allergic to alcohol, and I want to follow the principle of going to bed early and getting up early. Therefore, I usually have a peaceful dinner with my family in the evening, reading and thinking alone, and then fall asleep peacefully without any special activities.But the main reason I don’t socialize is that I’m socially awkward, and meeting a group of people bothers me.And I’ve always thought that loneliness is a basic condition of being alive.We are bound to have relationships with other people in our lives, but it is impossible for us, whether we are lovers or family members, to be one with us 100%.A man’s thoughts determine his actions and the way he lives, and thinking about this cannot be done with anyone.Feeling, thinking, thinking, choosing, deciding — these processes that form the essence of life can only be done independently.We must face up to this fact.So, I accept loneliness as a basic condition.I don’t meet people or carouse with friends to hide my loneliness.Instead, I thought and learned alone, hoping to move as far as POSSIBLE in the direction of my goals.Of course, as accustomed as I am to solitude, loneliness has not always been my companion.I am also often captured by the fear of loneliness, fear, insecurity and so on.Work, in particular, is a battle against loneliness.If we do not have the consciousness to confront the world with one against a hundred, we cannot complete the ideal work.Sometimes, even when you are alone in the face of criticism and opposition, you must resist without retreat.I want to take everyone’s feelings into consideration, listen to everyone’s opinions, and make good plans in a warm atmosphere of discussion — it is impossible in reality.So I don’t get stuck in the “I’m so unlucky, I have to do it alone” mood like the tragic hero.It’s about recognizing that you’re born alone and thinking about how to live with it.This attitude applies to all situations in life, not just at work.”How do you feel about loneliness and loneliness?”This is a question that can shape a great deal of life.Secondly, I often ask myself, “Can I still be alone?”Living alone in a foreign country when I was young taught me how harsh the process of dealing with loneliness can be, and gained important growth and training from it.Even now, I keep telling myself “have the strength and courage to be alone.”Sometimes, I would even cut off all contact with others, even if I was regarded as a “geek” and ostracized by friends, even if I was criticized as “that guy is too bad to date”, all accepted.Amazingly, this gives the two parties a chance to actually communicate.Because unmentionable things are not usually discussed at dinner, I had the opportunity to have a positive conversation.Isn’t it lonelier to live on weak superficial relationships than to be alone?Because of loneliness, I want to get close to others, which is dependent and dependent on each other’s heart.Trust, love and friendship cannot be nurtured in such a relationship.What’s more, groups are not human.You may be tempted to live in a “comfort zone” surrounded by familiar companions.But why not summon up the courage, resolutely let go of a solo travel?”This is going to be annoying to the other person.” If you get into the habit of saying “whatever” because of worrying about it, work on it now.Embrace loneliness and follow through on your opinions and positions.To have a strong fear of friction and wind and waves.Such an attitude can protect our stable life.Only with the power to walk alone in the dark can we form deep connections with those we pass by.Original title: “Yitaro Matsuura: What Should we Think about Loneliness and Loneliness?”